Honoring Parents, part 2 vol.3 no.17
A child should not remove a splinter from his parents because he may cause more bleeding, which is prohibited. Similarly, a doctor should not perform surgery on his parents. However, if there is no one else available to remove the splinter or perform surgery than the child should do what ever is necessary to maintain his parents’ health. In similar instances it would be permissible to administer an injection to a parent even though a drop of blood might be drawn. It is advisable to seek Rabbinic guidance regarding such matters.
A child may not slight his parents even non-verbally, with gestures or facial expressions.
A parent should not be overly particular in regards to his children honoring him in order that that should not transgress any prohibition. Rather he should forgive any slight to his honor and guide them towards properly fulfilling their obligations.
A parent should avoid hitting an older child because this might cause the child to react in a prohibited way against his parent. Rather a parent should try to admonish him verbally.
If a son wants to travel to a certain place to learn Torah because he thinks he will improve his learning and his parents disapprove, he is not obligated to obey them. As well, if a son wants to marry a certain woman and his parents disapprove he is not obligated to obey them.
One is obligated to honor a step-parent as long as his biological parent is still alive. However, it is proper to honor a step-parent even after the death of his parent. One is also obligated to honor his in-laws. One should honor his grandparents keeping in mind that his parents’ honor comes first.
A convert to Judaism is not allowed to act disrespectfully towards his parents, rather he should show them proper honor and respect.
